November 09, 2011

My "Diet Secrets"

Girls always ask my what I do to stay fit. I never tell them because to be perfectly honest, I'm a super unhealthy eater. I have really odd eating habits which somehow work for me.

Here is my typical day of eating (I'm not suggesting anyone try these!):

1. I almost never eat breakfast. Being a night owl, I never get up early enough for breakfast. And when I do, the appetite is never there. Unless you put a big fat brownie in front of me. I might eat that.

2. Lunch is usually a coffee and a hot pocket. Except that E.W. buys me Fit Active hot pocket rip-offs that have half the calories of real Hot Pockets and taste sooooo much better. Sometimes I skip the hot pocket altogether and just have coffee.

3. By 6 o'clock, when E.W gets home, I'm hungry enough to eat two horses and a pig. I usually snack on something while I'm cooking because I can't wait any longer. Then, I have 2 or 3 servings of whatever I cooked. Be advised that I will only cook healthy foods! Foods like french fries, white bread, anything fried, pies, and cakes are a no-no in my cooking.

4. At around 11pm I start getting hungry again and have a midnight snack. Usually pretzel sticks, a cereal bar or another coffee.

A typical weekend of eating (Definitely don't try this!):

1. Have a coffee in the morning.

2. Don't eat all day.

3. Pig out at around 2am at a diner after drinking for a few hours.

*Sigh* E.W always tells me my eating habits will catch up to me one day. But while I still can, why not?

I just can't imagine eating 8 small meals spread throughout the day. How torturous! Just as you start really enjoying your meal, it's ripped away from you and you need to wait another 2 hours for another taste. Uh uh.. no thank you.

When I eat, I like my meals big. Like HUGE. Big as in I usually eat more than a grown man during dinner.

So there you go girlies. This is why I don't tell you my "diet secrets"!

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